


I Won't Say I Love You Until I Know You Love Me Too

by twistedprincess



Series: The Course Of Love Never Did Run Smooth, Killjoy [4]
Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Album), My Chemical Romance
Genre: M/M, Sadness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-03 23:04:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2891426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twistedprincess/pseuds/twistedprincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>NEXT IS THE REAL STORY, MOTHERFUCKERS.</p></blockquote>





	I Won't Say I Love You Until I Know You Love Me Too

Ghoul tried to start his lighter up before he reached the diner door. He just needed a smoke. The stress of having Party back, having Party back but not being able to see him, was just a little too much right now. He had just gotten his lighter to work when he looked up through the diner windows to see a familiar red outside. He stopped before pushing the door of the diner open, his heart rate picking up. He walked outside, hit by the chill of desert nighttime before he saw him. He sat on the hood of the Trans Am, laying back on the heels of his hands, looking like he never even left, like nothing even happened.

Ghoul had to gather the courage to walk over to the car and cough, "You're not s'posed to be out here y'know." He said quietly, standing a good 8 feet away from the car, away from him.

"I know," Was the soft reply.

Ghoul looked down, and back up the the back of the red head of hair, "Kobra will kill you if he finds you out here."

Party scoffed and shrugged, "Kobra is only worried that I'll go on some Scarecrow physco break and kill everything I see."

Ghoul scuffed his boot across the sand, "Would you?" He asked, not really meaning anything by it.

"No." Party bit back hastily. "I wouldn't even do that if I was a BLI brat."

Ghoul nodded even though Party wasn't looking at him.

"They wouldn't let me see you." Ghoul said quietly.

"I know." Party sighed. "They had good reasons."

"Oh." Ghoul said, looking up and biting at his lower lip.

Party groaned and sat up slightly. "I didn't mean it like- I mean, they were worried that I would go on some kind of weird break by seeing you since you technically pulled me out of whatever BLI thing they had me on."

"What?" Ghoul questioned, taking a small step forward.

Party sighed and sat up more, "I thought so hard about everything out here in the desert to try and break the down the drugs they put in me, to make me like this. I was having this internal battle with who I was. I couldn't control half of myself. I thought about the desert, and fighting, and Kobra, and the diner, and then I thought about you, and the Scarecrow just... snapped."

Ghoul nodded, trying to make sense of what Party said.

They stood in silence for a long while after that, just kind of thinking to themselves, until Ghoul spoke up again.

"You promised me y'know? That they wouldn't take you away from me." Ghoul said quietly.

Party froze before nodding. "I know." He said back, just as quiet.

"You said whatever deal you had with Korse wouldn't take you away." Ghoul said, his throat constricting.

"You promised that you wouldn't come after me." Party said, coldly.

Ghoul huffed and shook his head, becoming annoyed with Party's behavior. "What else was I supposed to do, Party?"

"Live. Move on. Be a Killjoy. Fight BLI." Party said, without emotion.

"Like fuck I would do that without you."

"You should have, you promised me, you wouldn't come after me."

"You caused a lot of bad shit to happen, Party Poison."

"I know."

"You gave up on me. You let them take you away without going down without a fight. You gave up on everything out here." Ghoul said, his voice raising slowly, letting his anger out at Party.

"Shut the fuck up!" Party raised his voice. He hopped off of the Trans Am and stood, facing Ghoul from far away. "You don't know shit about what I did Ghoul." Party hissed out.

"You gave up! You gave in, you bastard. You left me." Ghoul yelled at him, tears brimming at his eyes. "You let Korse take you. Then I tried to save you and you tell me what- that being a Killjoy is dumb, that we should give up, that I should give up. You told me you didn't love me."

"What? You're mad because I had to pull some things to get you out of there alive? You don't know what Korse was saying. You don't know half of what's happening."

"You gave up Killjoy info, Party! You betrayed us! You gave up on us, and then you come back here and act like you're a Killjoy again?" Ghoul said and spat at Party's feet. "Fuck you. You let Killjoys die for you."

Party walked over to Ghoul and shoved him. "I was protecting us. You don't understand. You can't blame this on me. If you wouldn't have shown up to try and save the fuckin' day-"

"Then what? You would have saved us? Huh, Party? Cause you're not saving anyone right now. You definitely weren't saving us when you were a Scarecrow." Ghoul said and shoved at Party's shoulders, pushing him back.

"I knew what I was going, Ghoul. I knew what had to be said, and be done to keep us alive. I knew what I was saying when I said all those things to you." He hissed grabbing Ghoul by his vest. "You should have left me on the side of the fucking road. I know what I'm doing better than any of you, none of you understand."

"You don't know shit. You lied to me. You promised me. I can't believe you." Ghoul said, pushing Party's hands away and shaking his head, tears spilling over. "You're a fucking cunt. You don't care about us. You're still a fucking Scarecrow."

"You can't say that."

"I can say whatever I want! Because it's true. You don't feel anything do you? You're just like them, you just want to defeat BLI and nothing else, that's all you feel now."

"You can't say that, Ghoul."

"Yes I can, you don't feel anything for me, Party. Not now at least."

"Ghoul-"

" _You_ can't even say it. Fuckin' Crow."

"Ghoul- you can't- I don't-"

Ghoul laughed, dry and helpless, as he wiped tears from his cheeks. "That's fine, Party." Ghoul stood there, just sighing, looking at Party. Party, the person who he thought could do anything, could save them, could get them out of the desert. "'You lied to me. How am I supposed to know if you're not going to lie again?" Ghoul said, helplessly, his arms folding across his chest protectively.

"I'm so sorry, Ghoul. I just wanted to keep you safe." Party said quietly.

Ghoul shook his head as more tears escaped out of his eyes.

"Please don't cry, Ghoulie." Party said and Ghoul took a few stray steps backwards, wanting to get away from Party but Party was quicker, reaching out and pulling Ghoul forward, wrapping his arms around him. "I just wanted you safe." Party whispered when Ghoul finally let go and clutched to Party's shirt, crying. "You don't know what he said to me. You showed up and he said he- Oh god, Ghoul- I couldn't have let-" Party choked out and wrapped his arms tighter around Ghoul. "The things he said he would do to you. I- I couldn't let it happen, and he said that you could go. I had to. Oh fuck, I had to do whatever I could to get you out and back here." 

"You said you didn't love me. You let them take you from me." Ghoul whimpered.

"I know, I know. I'm so sorry." Party said quietly. "I do, Ghoulie. I do love you, so much. I love you so much. I'm going to get us out, okay? Don't- just have faith in me. I promise I'll fix it."

Ghoul just cried harder.

Party had a whole lot to fix.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> NEXT IS THE REAL STORY, MOTHERFUCKERS.


End file.
